Sardarji Jokes

Sardarji is buying a TV.
"Do you have color TVs?"
"Give me a green one, please."

Two dogs, Rubi and Moti, and a Sardarji were sent to the outer  space.
The ground control issues commands
         "Press the red button."
         "Woof! Woof!"
   "Press the white button."
   "Woof! Woof!"
   "Stop barking, feed the dogs and don't touch anything!"

Two Sardarjis are in a railway station.
"Can I take this train to Ludhiana?" asks the first. "No,"  answers the RR man.
  "Can I?" asks the second Sardarji.

A passerby notices a Sardarji by the side of a lake, throwing  bricks into the water.  So he asks the Sardarji
"Why are you throwing bricks in to the water?"

The Sardarji takes a brick and again throws it into the water  and says thoughtfully
"See, I've been trying to solve the mystery: why are the bricks rectangular  and the waves circular?"

Sardarji is walking his two  beautiful dogs in the park. A passerby  stops & asks the sardarji.
" These are beautiful dogs. What are their names?"
"This one is Gurbux Singh, and the other one is Khudabux Singh"
The passerby is impressed and exclaims    "This is the first time  have heard of sensible names for
dogs.  I am so happy to meet you. May I know your name?"
Sardarji  says "Tony!"

A Surd applied for an engineering position at a Punjabi firm based in Amritsar. A Pathan applied for the same job and both applicants having the same qualifications were asked to take a test by the Department manager. Upon completion of the test both men only missed one of the questions.

The manager went to Surd and started.
Manager: "Thank you for your interest, but we've decided to give the Pathan the job"

Surd: "And why would you be doing that? We both got 9 questions correct.
This being Punjab and me being Punjabi I should get the job!"

Manager: "We have made our decision not on the correct answers, but on the question you  missed"

Surd: "And just how would one incorrect answer be better than the other?"

Manager: "Simple, the Pathan put down on question  5, "I don't know", You put down, "Neither do I "

                        How to instantly recognize a Surd

     You should be sure it is a sardarji when somebody :

* puts lipstick on the forehead because he wants to makeup his mind.
* gets stabbed in a shoot-out.
* sends a fax with a stamp on it.
* tries to drown a fish.
* thinks socialism means partying.
* trips over a cordless phone.
* takes a ruler to bed to see how long he slept.
* At the bottom of the application where it says "Sign Here" he puts "Sagittarius."
* studies for a blood test and fails.
* sells the car for gas money.
* misses the 44 bus, and takes the 22 twice instead.
* drives to the airport and sees a sign that said, "Airport  left",  he turns around and goes home.
* gets locked in Furniture Shop and sleeps on the floor

Sikhs and Pakistanis were in trenches facing each other . One Sikh shouted 'Mohammed Mia ' and a Pakistani soldier stands up and shouts  'Mohammed Mia ko kisne bulaya ? (who called me ?) and gets shot.  Another Sikh shouts 'Azam Khan ' and Azam Khan stands up and says..and gets shot.

The Pakistanis think this is a great idea and decide to copy it ( it is in the genes to do everything after the Indians !) . So  a Pakistani soldier shouts 'Swaran Singh '. There is just silence. After a couple of minutes a Sikh shouts 'Swaran Singh ko kisne bulaya ? (who called Swaran Singh? ) , and a Pakistani soldier stands up and.. and gets shot...