Statue

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening  the front door.

"Hurry!" she said, "Stand in the corner." She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder.

"Don't move until I tell you to." she whispered. "Just pretend you're a statue."

"What's this, honey?" the husband asked as he entered the room.

"Oh, it's just a statue." she replied nonchalantly.
"The Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I liked the idea so much, I got one for us, too." No more was said about the "statue".

Later that night when they went to sleep. Around two in the morning the husband got out of bed, went into the kitchen, and returned with a sandwich and a glass of milk.

"Here." he said to the 'statue'. "Eat this. I stood like an idiot at the Smiths for three days and nobody offered me so much as a glass of water."